My Sheep, Plus, a Large Problem

Hello.

I'll start with the happy stuff . . . here's a photo of my sheep.  I'm a herding dog.  I love to herd.  But unfortunately, we live in town and are not allowed to keep sheep in the yard for some reason.  I wonder why?  But my owners gave me special sheep to herd.  Here's one of my flocks:

 

Here's my indoor flock:

My people try to help me by kicking the sheep around, but I've found my teeth to be much more effective.

Now for the bad news:
The big lady came home with a funny package today from some strange place called 'Petsmart.'  Inside was something called the 'Gentle Leader.'  The lady and the little girl kept putting it on me, then taking it off of me, then adjusting it, then putting it on me again, then taking it off of me, then adjusting it again, ad infinitum.  After a long, long time, we went for a walk with this abhorrent little thing and I really did NOT like it. 

The message that the humans are sending me is this: I, apparently, am not the leader of the pack.  I am not the king of the castle.  Apparently, these people think in their little brains that they are above me.  It's a tough pill to swallow, I know.  But I will not surrender!  I will not give in!  I will keep you posted on how our next walk goes!  I might try to grab this 'gentle leader' and chew it apart when no one's looking!

PetSmart?  How about PetStupid!!!

I Have Been REALLY Busy . . .

Seriously.  I don't even really have time to be doing this, as I SHOULD be in my crate right now, but boy have I been having some exciting adventures that I'd like to tell you about.  My day usually starts off with me 'doing my numbers' as the people say, then it's outside to round up my sheep.  My sheep are a little different than the usually fluffy kind, but I love them just the same.  I have my indoor sheep and my outdoor sheep, as a matter of fact, and they are both very dear to me.  The big lady helps me round them up . . . then she kicks them around again, and I chase after them and try to keep them all in line.  Are you wondering what my sheep look like?  I'll tell the lady to post some photos.

Oh YES . . . I almost forgot to mention that I ate a whole stick of butter the other day.  It was FANTASTIC.  I highly recommend that everyone eats a stick of butter at least once in their lifetime.  I'm constantly on the lookout for another one, but as far as I can tell they're kept in a big shiny box that the people call 'refrigerator.'

Admittedly, the butter was a bit messy when it came to, uh, the exit, but it's a price worth paying, I think.

The day after I ate the butter, I decided to play 'pirate' and grabbed a great big knife off the cutting board in the kitchen.  The big lady wasn't amused by this one bit.  As a matter of fact, she looked horrified.  Sort of like this:  8O

What did she think I was planning on doing?  I'm not really sure, but she threw me a big cookie so I dropped it.  Now it doesn't seem like there's anything good on the kitchen counters anymore.  I wonder why? 

Here I am, learning to play the piano.  It's harder than you might think.

My Many Talents

Greetings, everyone, and happy Sunday!

I invite you all to take a minute to view the following video which displays some of my many talents:
catching popcorn in my mouth
shaking paws/hands
licking the camera

Enjoy!

Finally--Success!

Today, I finally figured it out.  I discovered how to open the door of my crate!  Take that you insignificant humans!  And so, my hostile takeover begins.  Haha . . . just kidding.  Or am I???

Uh . . . what?

BUSTED

Ham and Cheese, A Poem

Ham and cheese!  Ham and cheese!
Oh, how I love ham and cheese!
Alone or together,
Whatever the weather
I'll eat it in bits,
It gives me the fits,
I'll do anything you please,
For some ham and cheese.

(Seriously--anything.  It's awful, I know.)